At Home DEEP Diving

April 28, 2021

At Home DEEP Diving

Good morning. A new season has arrived, Spring and it's been so lovely seeing nature wake up from its slumber. It was also my birthday last week and I'm lucky to share it with mother earth, as it falls on Earth Day. She opens her arms wide in spring releasing her elements of air and water in the most intense manner, rain and wind. In NY, storms park and hover for far too long. We just up, go and deal with it or we'd never get out. I believe the pollution in the air traps the storms in its grip and the storm then crawls like a turtle out to the ocean. Whereas in less polluted areas, storms come and go with the wind, as they're meant to be. We're still at home here as the virus continues to spread. Things are slowly opening up, restaurants finally opened back up here, but to limited capacities, I'll be dining only outside however. I've just passed the marker where I'm now fully vaccinated. That second day of the moderna shot was killer for women. I read in the NYT it has something to do with our immune chromosomes. Some didn't get it too bad, such as my sister Jessica, she was fine. I on the other hand, was bed bound for about two days. It's all worth it to not have to fear dying anymore.

While we're still at home, I've discovered the love of cooking from scratch. I know I'm very late to the party. I love Chef Ramsay and have been using some of his recipes. Recently I made halibut with crispy, lemon baby potatoes and topped it all off with a french beurre blanc sauce. I think it turned out amazing, if I do say so myself. I miss my mom so much, so this past weekend I made one of her Nicaraguan dishes and I wanted it to be exactly like hers: slow oven roasted pork marinated in garlic, sour orange juice, lime juice with pan fried platanos, tostones, yellow rice, black beans and garnished with finely chopped cabbage, carrots, onions and a lime, olive oil and vinegar dressing. I turned on some latin jazz and felt like I was in my mom's kitchen. Mama's girl right here, all the way, all the time, forever. This past weekend on my mom's advice I made beef, potatoes and carrots in the slow cooker with a side of rice and salad, it wasn't hard at all. I'm starting to sound like a real cook. So yes, I love it, I turn on the tunes, poor some vino and go to town. For tunes, I'm loving the Classic Rewind channel on Sirius XM lately. It plays all kinds of old goodies such as: Journey, Def Leppard, Police, The Fixx, The Cars etc.

At home has been so relaxing - although a little burnt out on it - there's been plenty of time to dive deeper into interests or passions. If you've been reading this blog for a bit, you know I like the spiritual realm. In fact, I try to connect to it as often as possible. My goal is to re-create what happened to me many, many moons ago, I would say around my 24th year. I started meditating back then and it was easy for me to get into the desired state. After an evening of watching the sun set and the moon rise, I went back home and started to meditate, for me it's a great way to get ready to sleep. I was deep in, nothing could distract me and then it happened............ my soul rose up and out of my body......... ; from my heart chakra to be exact. I could feel it happening and it made me open my eyes, when I did that and from the angle I was laying, I saw a three dimensional version of myself rising up! Let me just say, it scared me to death!!! It was extremely powerful, I didn't know with practice that could happen, I was a beginner. It scared me so much that I stopped meditating...FOR YEARS.

Now I'd do anything for it to happen again. I didn't want it back then because I didn't even know about it, so it happened naturally. Now I understand it and am on a quest to get back there. There are other experiences that can happen with a regular and serious practice of meditation and / or yoga, a kundalini awakening for one. It's said to happen when all of your chakras have "opened." Kundalini is a religious experience in the Hindu religion and first found in ancient Hindu and Buddhist texts in the 9th century BCE. The premise is that the chakras are activated through meditative visualizations, awakening the feminine spiritual power, creating spiritual liberation. I love this philosophy. It's also said that if you're not ready for it, it could be a terrible experience, as it causes an extreme emotional transformation of consciousness. A chakra is said to be an invisible, spinning, energy vortex arranged in a column along the spinal cord, from the base to the top of the head. The new age belief is that there are seven main chakras - ancient belief suggests up to 88,000. Starting from the root, up to the sacral, the solar plexus, the heart, throat, third eye and finally the crown:

After my soul coming out, I did stop meditating because it was so intense and I thought, great, I've gone too far...again. I didn't know what I had activated, but I knew it was something major and that I'd better let it rest for a bit. I never stopped being connected to the spiritual though and started reading books about it. They taught / teach me how to be "zen." Many years later, I did get back into it. Outside of my soul experience, I believe I've also had a kundalini awakening, it happened over time and before I knew what it was, another step on my spiritual journey I wasn't ready for, so of course I learned the hard way. I thought there was something wrong with me, when I know there wasn't. I was at a good place in my life, so it wasn't life stressors. I know when things are bad, when everything's gone tits up and you're broke. This wasn't one of those times, everything was good and I was meditating regularly; yet I was anxious, worried and cried a lot. Had I been ready for both of those important steps on my path, they would have been easier to receive, as I would have been expecting them. I survived however, with a stronger sense of self and inner bliss.

A visual for the kundalini is seen as a serpent lying dormat at the root, as the mind connects with each chakra, the serpent is said to wake. Once it's woke, it moves through the spinning chakras up and out into the world. Once it's out, it's said that you will experience an extreme transformation, described as feeling part of the universe and a lot of the questions about life you've had will be answered. You'll have a desire to love, give love and teach love. Things that used anger you will just come and go and you'll connect to the divine feminine and in sync with nature, as we too... are nature. My spiritual journey started in 1990, learning about different religions and searching for my true fit. I grew up very Catholic, but I knew it wasn't for me, because I didn't agree with its rules / beliefs: never have sex before marriage, confess your sins to a priest, never use birth control, moses lived on a boat with every animal in the world etc. etc. I did like the peaceful atmosphere inside the church and the ceremonial aspects however. In 1993 my curiosity led me to the book: The Celestine Prophecy, by James Redfield, did anyone else read this? It struck a chord with me.

So far my journey has taught me about enlightenment; how to heal myself from my pains, live in the present, enjoy life to its fullest, accept my failures as learnings / lessons and pivots in my destiny, have immense gratitude for my good fortunes, forgiveness, respect for all religions and cultures and wish happiness for my friends, family and for you. I wasn't as open before as I am now, I like to think I was always a nice person, but I know I could (can?) do assholey things sometimes. Now I want to spread love, peace and wish the same for other people. It's so nice to see meditation becoming more mainstream, I hope it continues to spread and grow, we need something to balance out all of the horrible racism, police brutality, mass shootings, sexism, rape and divisions we live with in the world. When I meet someone who says they meditate it makes me happy, I know I've met a good person, or are trying to be and trying is good enough for me, we all make mistakes. There is no "right" religion, as long as the path you're on makes you happy, at peace and a better person, that's what right for you. There's nothing wrong with exploring though.

As for my spiritual journey, it continues. I know there's more out there, because of my own personal glimpse into the realm, so I'll continue on this road, picking up pieces that fit for me along the way. The spiritual is a very large sphere however and there is much to learn, much more than I know and there's plenty of extra time right now at home to do so.

Namaste