I Want To Know

Dear ______ ,

I don't know if I ever told you, because I never had the chance I guess, the truth is that I always loved you. What you look like is unclear now, it used to be burned in my memory and is now turned into ashes and left for the heavens. There are questions unanswered and misunderstood, actions taken with indignation. Swimming inside, deep down and drowning of sorrow. There I am all alone longing for an answer, did you love me too? I want to know... I want to know.

The sun shines and the phone rings, Come over. To be a part of your world and fill in the empty spaces of your life brought me joy. I fit in those lonely corners and made you laugh when you were blue. Time passed with each season and I never forgot about you. I used to tell you everything about my life and now we are back to strangers, like the time we first met.
I want to know.

Encounters with time passed brings forth buried feelings of desire. The fire still burns, even though I did everything I could to put it out. Poured water on it, stomped on it, forgot about it, and yet a small flame sways back and forth calling for me. I don't know what burns more, that I loved you, love you now, wanting to know if you loved me....or the s i l e n c e.

Knowing I love and can love brings me peace. I do love and know I loved you, does that make me the winner then? I want to know...

-Missing you



This little piece was inspired by a beautiful wedding celebration I attended on Sunday night and it got me thinking about true love. We all want to know if we are truly loved, don't we?.. xxooo
pic: cameron russell

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